I was six years old when I saw spots floating above me and had my first seizure. As an adult living with seizures, I’m motivated to be strong and determined to live a successful life.

Fireworks are exploding in my eyes. You can’t see them, but they’re multicolored circles of blue, red, and green. If you could see them, these fireworks would not elicit “oohs” and “aahs.” They continue to grow larger into one group. I feel the need to throw up at this point, so I spit into a towel. I never expel anything. I swipe my Vagus Nerve Stimulator magnet. My throat tightens and feels ticklish. My voice becomes husky, and it doesn’t sound like me. My hearing is fine, but words won’t matter in a few minutes because I blackout. Some people panic when this happens because they’re not quite sure how to help me. Some are confident because they’re familiar with seizures and know how to help.

The blackness recedes.

I sigh when the seizure releases, a soul-soothing expression of carbon dioxide escaping from deep within. My right arm and right leg stop shaking. My body becomes calm, but I’m distracted by the pounding in my head because a migraine headache demands my energy. My body is tired, and I feel the need to rest. When I wake up, I am sore due to the strain on my muscles from my body shaking however, I feel relaxed and refreshed.